ONE simple trick to help toddlers and young kids behave at Mass (+ WIWS)

I've been reading a lot of blog posts floating around recently about helping toddlers and young kids behave at Mass. 

Unfortunately though NONE of them mentioned  my ONE simple trick that if we can pull if off, works for our toddlers and young kids almost 100% of the time to ensure good Mass behavior. 

That's right folks.  

With OUR kids, this trick works close to 100% of the time to ensure good Mass behavior. 

YOUR  results may vary.

Are you ready for the ONE simple trick that almost always works for us?

Just send me $19.95...and I'll send you my one simple trick!

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Kidding, kidding.  Because I'm so nice, I'm going to tell you it for free (but I'll take $19.95 if you want to send it to me anyway). 

Here's our trick!

BOX THEM IN WITH STRANGERS

Just be sure to sit with strangers in front of you, strangers behind you, strangers to the left of you and strangers to the right of you. 

They don't even have to be strange strangers.  Perfectly normal strangers work great too. 

That's right DON'T sit on the end, sit in the middle of the pew.  And sit the "problem child(ren)" next to the stranger. 

If your kids are anything like mine, they will be too shy to misbehave sitting in such close proximity to A STRANGER.  

I'm pretty sure this is my toddler's thoughts process when sitting right next to A STRANGER. 

I can't talk, I can't cry, I can't move, I can't do anything other than cling to mommy or daddy because that strange person there might notice me and if they do, they might kidnap me and sell me to the gypsies where I will never, ever get ice cream or nana again.  That would be terrible. 

And that's pretty much what my kids do, for the entire Mass...quietly sit on our lap because they are too shy to be loud or talk or try to climb past A STRANGER.

If your kids aren't shy like that...sorry...I've got nothing.  

But it works for us. 

If you want to read more of my posts about children at church, check out. 

My Thoughts on Cry Rooms. 

Dear Parents of Young Kids in Church. 

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And here's a picture of What I Wore today and our running toddler who did not run around at Mass today, because she hates strangers. 

The shirt is from Twice (which is an online thrift store).  I just tried them and love them.  If you buy something through that link, we each get $10.  So, you can go get a free shirt or something. And they offer free returns with store credit.  So, you're bound to find something you like. 

The skirt was passed on to me by a friend (my husband hates that skirt, but I love it). 

And, we won't talk about my shoes because you can't really see them in the picture anyway but rest assured I did wear shoes to Mass today. 

You can see more Sunday fashions at Fine Linen and Purple

Dear Parents of Young Kids In Church

Dear Parents of Young Kids in Church,

Your children probably aren't as disruptive as you think they are.   

Today is the feast of the Holy Family (liturgically the day we got married...cool huh? Have you seen my 7 Ways to Happily Ever After?)

The Mass we usually attend has one of those children's liturgy things where the kids go out and have their own separate teaching during the readings/homily, etc (P.S. I'm personally not a fan of those and my kids always stay in the pew...but that is a post for another time).   Today they didn't have it, so all the kids were at Mass the whole time.   And, I will confess that while I tried to focus solely on Mass, my attention did wander and I ended up observing a few of the familes in the pews.  No, this doesn't mean their kids were particularly disruptive...in fact they weren't. I was also observing the row of college students sitting together and the women with the hair bonnet (pray for her, I suspect she may be a cancer patient) and the single lady across the way.  Yep, being distracted during Mass is something I majorly struggle with. 

One thing I LOVE aboug being Catholic is how welcome children are during Mass.  Some churches offer nursery or a "children's liturgy during a part of the Mass" but most of them (in my experience) don't.  Which is great....there is no pressure to leave crying babies in a nursery with people they don't know.   I've heard too many Protestant friends worry about leaving their children in the nursery and how their children just cry the whole time and aren't welcome in the main service. 

Yet, all this attending Mass with children can be stressful.  I've so been there.  My 15-month old, Elsa, alternates between being a total angel (because she is napping in my arms) and wanting nothing more than to run around and escape the pew.  I can totally understand that stressed out, worried look and I saw it on way too many parents today.

And to those parents...I just want to say, that yes..it's hard.  I get it.   But, also, relax.  Your kids probably aren't being as disruptive as you think they are.  Yes, you need to teach them how to sit quitely and listen..but you want to hear a little secret.  It's TIME and AGE and PRACTICE that teaches kids to sit quietly and listen during Mass.   They grow up, they get older, their attentions span lengthens and that whole sitting still thing gets loads easier.  Keep taking them.  Keep taking them out if they start screaming.  Keep gently correcting them, don't STRESS over it, or worry if your three year wants to turn around and look at the people behind her, or your five year old is making faces (that was MY five year, by the way and yes I did stress over it, until my wonderful husband reminded me that he is only five and sitting still in church is hard).  Don't worry if your 1-year old wants to stand on the pew or your 2 year wants to stand on the kneeler.  They'll grow older, they'll learn and it will all come together.  One day you'll just realize that you don't even worry about their Mass behavior anymore. Oh what a happy day that will be!

And, since it's Sunday, I'm linking up with Fine Linen and Purple so you can all see what I wore today.  And you can also see our super sad, very tiny, Charlie Brown Christmas tree that is way overloaded with ornaments and (falling) tinsel and lights.  So whatever your Chrismas tree looks like....rest assured it HAS to look better than this one.  

Sweater: ThredUp (the most awesome online thrift store ever...and if you buy through my link we BOTH get ten dollars credit!)

Shirt: believe it or not, I think this shirt is from the 70's!  Seriously, I think I got it from clothes my aunt left at my grandmother's house.

Skirt: I think it's also super, super old.   Not totally sure where I got it.

Boots: Wal-Mart

Glasses: Zenni

What I Wore Sunday

Linking up with Fine Linen and Purple for another WIWS.

We just, just moved..and the movers haven't arrived with all our stuff yet (should get here tomorrow), so I was working with 1/3 of my normal outfit options when I put this outfit together.  So, that's why it's kinda boring and neutral-ish.  And I'm pretty sure it's a repeat too...but I'm too lazy to actually check that out myself.

The shirt is thrifted.  The skirt is Old Navy and the shoes...you can't see..but those were given to me. 

This is our new backyard in the house we are renting.  The swing-set came with it...we added the baby swing ourselves...finding it on clearance for only $20.  Best $20 spent ever...because this picture is a lie.  I'm  never the one swinging the baby (this is just how my photographer wanted to stage the picture)....the older kids all do it and it keeps her happy and contained  and out of Trouble (with a capital T)...so that makes me happy.   Ever since she started walking, she's been a handful and a half. 

Speaking of Elsa,  she gets a C for Mass today....she did lots of eating of the Mass inserts and screeching and wanting to get down and toddle around...and had to be taken out.   She did nurse and fall asleep at the very end...which bumped her up from a C- to a C.   And, we were less than impressed with the church we tried out today...so we'll be trying a different one next week.   Unfortunately, from websites, it looks as though our best option might be a church 30 minutes away.  Le sigh....I hate driving...but I fear I shall be doing lots of it in our new locale. 

So, now that you've read my whining and seen my boring outfit.....go forth and see happier and better dressed bloggers.