I Finally Get Why So Many Moms Need Quiet-time and Naptime.

Over Christmas, Ben and I were listening to a free CD from Matthew Kelly put out by our diocese. In the CD, Matthew Kelly talks about how 2 PM-5 PM is strict naptime in his house. STRICT.

Ben and I just looked at each other laughing.  

We have never been strict on naptime.  Never. 

All my kids stopped napping by the time they were three. Three.  And since our kids are spaced further apart..I've never really had 2 nappers at once. 

I never felt a need for an extended quiet time or strict naptime.  In fact, I couldn't wait for my kids to give up naps, so we could be free to go out anywhere and anytime without worrying about nap schedules.

In fact, I even wrote about how I hate naps. 

That was then...this is now.

What changed is that we now live in a super tiny house.  I mean super tiny.  Six people...two bedrooms, less than 1000 square feet.

Yes, it is as awful as it sounds.  And, yes, we will be moving as soon as we are able (which will hopefully be VERY SOON!).

I've discovered that I DO in fact need quiet during the day.  

Source

When we lived in a bigger house..that wasn't a problem.  The kids could go play in the playroom or in their bedrooms or outside. I could hide in the bedroom. I could snatch little moments of quiet, even without a designated quiet time...I had quiet. 

I could actually be in a room ALL BY MYSELF. 

I couldn't plan those times..but they came. 

And I savored them. That's all I really needed. 

Now...there is no quiet. The walls are closing in and I can't get away. The house is too small and the rooms are too close together and it's too cold outside.  There are no moments of quiet to snatch.  From 7 AM to 9 PM, it's non-stop noise and talking and commotion. 

There is no hiding in one bedroom, because the other bedroom is right next door..and I can hear every word, every squabble, every yell. It's wearing on me. 

I need quiet..every single day.  And now that I know what I need, I can't get it. You can't exactly put a 10-year old into quiet time.  Or a six-year old for that matter. 

And the kids need it too.  They need to be able to spread out.  They need to be able to get away from each other.  They need to be able to have a place to play monopoly or chess where two-year old hands can't mess up their game.  They've taken to playing monopoly or chess in our one bathroom.  Which is even more problematic than it sounds.  

There aren't enough rooms to spread out into.

So to every mom for whom I secretly never understood the need for quiet time or strict naptime.  I'm sorry.  I get it now. I need it too.  

Tinatella

This is the story of Tinatella (tin-a-tell-a). Tinatella is different. She has pink skin and polka dots on her face. The other girls think she is ugly and make fun of her, but I think she is beautiful. See her...she is so beautiful, with her beautiful pink skin and polka dot face. The other girls make fun of her and think she is ugly, because she is different..but she is really beautiful and I love her.

This is the story Greta told his afternoon while she was procrastinating doing her actual school and begging to finish this one drawing while I drink my milk.  Greta doesn't just draw pictures though...she tells stories about every picture.  And, this was the story she told this afternoon.   I found it very interesting...her choice of words and topic.  We haven't really talked about people who are "different."  They really only know one person who is "different"  or has a "disability"...my sister/their aunt, and they've always known her and her "difference" has nothing to do with her face (it has to do with her legs).

Yet, this was the story she told.  And, it got me thinking.  Last Thursday (on 3/21) was World Down Syndrome Day (see...told you, I'm always late to the game..just posting about it now).  Other than seeing a few random adults with Down Syndrome at church or stores, I've never really known any families affected by Down Syndrome until about 1 1/2 years ago when a family we knew through law gave birth to a beautiful baby girl with Down Syndrome.  They are 20-something and Abigail is their first child. The husband graduated from law school last year and they've moved out of Florida, but I've followed their lives and adventures through Jacqueline's blog, Journey Narrative.  Since knowing them and reading her blog, I've really learned a lot about Down Syndrome. 

I had already known that over 90% of all babies prenatally diagnosed with Down Syndrome are aborted (thanks to my mom and her book.)  Which is a tragedy...because EVERY person's life is valuable and important and worth living and worth fighting for.  So, this post is my small way of trying to bring awareness to this issue.  It's ALWAYS worth it to choose life, because LIFE is worth choosing.  No mother regrets the babies she has...only the ones she doesn't...so if you ever come across anyone dealing with an "adverse" prenatal diagnosis...send them this book and help them choose LIFE...because EVERY LIFE has value and worth.

And maybe, just maybe, Greta's story and drawing was more important than her spelling words this afternoon.